A Reflection on "What about us","Brown Lives Matter Too":
We do not have to turn a blind eye to the level of anti-blackness that surfaces when our own community starts to express "what about us?" "Brown lives matter too." I know many people mean well and are expressing a much justified feeling of injustice but I do not think restating Black Lives Matter in a "brown" version is the answer.
We cannot blame our perceived inaction as a people and get enraged when we see a lot of our own people participating in Black Lives Matter actions. We should feel proud that for the first time in history, we are turning up in massive numbers. Many "people of color" relate to the call for justice and understand that the call to end ALL INJUSTICE AGAINST BLACK PEOPLE is also our own . Since day one there has been a lot of resistance and movements to call for justice for our indigenous communities. Many groups in the Mexican, Central American communities have worked tirelessly to fight for social, racial, and economic justice. Many people like myself, feel inspired to see so many people joining various movements and causes.I think we should all celebrate and embrace this new shift in activism.
It brings me so much joy to see how my people are starting to have a lot more conversations about injustice, police brutality, and activism.There is definitely a new energy that is flourishing and growing with each day. In order to maintain and nurture that feeling, I think it is precisely now, that we must sit and discuss these topics that have gone ignored for too long. There is so much work to be done, we can all contribute our strengths and talents in beautiful and transformative ways: but we must also cleanse.
It pains me to see how many times, I have to stop and try to be understanding to our people, who are waking up to this truth at this very time. I understand that we are not all aware of all of the language or expressions, but we still have the obligation of having these challenging conversations. We should love our people and ourselves enough to share these thoughts in a way that comes from compassion and understanding.
I was also raised to be anti-black. I recognize that this upbringing was never clearly expressed as anti-Blackness but I learned the lessons and was taught to replicate.
For example:
1. Being told to lock all doors and close all windows when we went to visit my family in Compton when we saw Black people
2. Being told that Black people are always up to no good and judging their rage during the 1992 uprisings of Los Angeles.
3. Growing up listening to Black music and hearing my own family and friends using the "N" word freely but yet they still expressed anti-Black sentiments.
These are just some of the most damaging lessons on how I was taught to preserve anti-Black sentiments.
It pains me to see our people constantly using terms like "mayates,", "pinches negros" and other hateful and disgusting terms when referencing the Black community. Always forgetting that there are also Black Mexicans, there are also Black Central Americans, this divisive talk further instills the white supremacist ideologies that are rooted in the national programs of "Mexico" and all Central American countries.
Once we know better, WE SHOULD DO BETTER. Let us cleanse ourselves and ask ourselves honest and painful questions:
1. Why am I so bothered to see my own people participating with Black Lives Matter?
2. Why was I not this passionate or angry before these massive actions?
3. Why do I feel justified with separating "them" from us as I focus on the viral videos of the "attacked vendors" and use that as my sole justification?
4. Have I reached out to other brown activists and ask how I can help?
5. How can I begin undoing this deep rooted anti-blackness to make sure I do not teach my younger family members and/or kids the same?
I write these thoughts after weeks and weeks of constantly receiving hate mail from "my own people" who are bothered with me for expressing solidarity with the BLM or Black community in general.
After 23 years of working hard to decolonize, educate, and share my research, poetry, and activism I have realized that I receive the worst hate mail EVERY TIME I show , express, or even hint at Brown and Black solidarity. I would say that maybe 10-20% of my work has been dedicate to showing solidarity and expressing these sentiments.
The anti-Blackness is so real and prevalent that the hate mail I receive completely OVER-LOOKS all of my years dedicated to "Mexican" issues.
I express this in hopes that we begin to cleanse ourselves from these mentalities. We have to start in our own homes. The most devastating part of all of these recent experiences, have allowed me to clearly see how many people that I had admired for so many years, also cater to this venomous practice.
I do not and will not shy away from these discussions. I am not perfect and have admitted my own failings. However, I will not continue to fail the next generation with my silence. Black and Brown liberation are not mutually exclusive. I agree that before judging and condoning our people, we have to obligation to share and welcome dialogue. True struggle requires us to uproot sentiments that have been securely embedded in our psyche and that require an honest and painful removal.
This is not a popularity contest. Our lives depend on each other. Supporting Black Lives Matter will NEVER HINDER OUR STRUGGLES.
In liberation,
Citlalli Citlalmina Anahuac
E-Decolonize
Mexican Excellence
6/14/20
